Ever been stuck in the middle of nowhere with no cellular service or gadget signals? Well, now you won't have to worry about walking for miles to that one lonely house, that's likely to be haunted or occupied by a psycho killer, to ask to use a phone that they probably have, with a busted cord!
So, spare yourself from becoming tomorrow's headliner by signing up for Roadside Assistance! A new program that comes with a device that works similarly to an ankle monitor, except it's inserted into your car's mechanism and tracks any unusual activity and will dispatch the correspondence accordingly! This chip creates and fills in signals that are between towers so it's always within tracking distances no matter where it is. If help arrives and the problem has been resolved or there wasn't a problem to begin at all, you won't be charged a single cent. Coolest fictional thing ever to have never existed! Oh, also, word around Cool Town is that this device also reports when you park in a red zone, run red lights and California roll your stop signs. So, please refrain from doing silly, unlawful things.
Now available in the Greater Cool Town areas such as Strange Town and other surrounding cities!